The Newtown Pentacle

Altissima quaeque flumina minimo sono labi

nearly total

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Humbug.

– photo by Mitch Waxman

Everyone’s got a cool ride, it seems. Your humble narrator would particularly like a somewhat militarized version of the DSNY Earth Mover pictured above. Mine would be painted black, with an illustration of a dragon riding sword chick (wearing boob armor like Red Sonja, natch) dueling with a witch in front of an impossibly large full moon on the scoop. A less dated motif for my earth mover would be to entirely cover it in googly eyes that jiggled about as I drove around and… y’know… moved earth.

– photo by Mitch Waxman

This goldenrod VW micro bus hasn’t moved from this spot on 43rd street in Maspeth for at least a couple of months now, and I’m beginning to suspect a Dr. Who sort of thing might be going on. Is this Volkswagen bigger on the inside, despite what I remember about the automotive line’s interior dimensions? What’s odd, actually, is the fact that a brightly colored machine can remain in this location for so long without becoming soiled by the ambient airborne particulates and pollutants which distinguishes this part of the ancient village. The BQE is literally on the next corner, and Newtown Creek is just down the hill.

– photo by Mitch Waxman

Over on Northern Boulevard, this fellow was spotted providing the motive force required to actuate his ride along the busy thoroughfare. One applauds the desire to become energy independent, but cautions against this sort of thing. Northern Boulevard is an automotive death machine, from the pedestrian point of view, and you are far better off being inside of a giant metal box than without.

“follow” me on Twitter- @newtownpentacle

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Written by Mitch Waxman

December 5, 2014 at 12:36 pm

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