Archive for January 2015
loftiest reward
Twirling, ever twirling.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
Last week, occasion brought me to Red Hook to work on an assignment, and in accordance with my habit – a hasty retreat to the Smith 9th street station was enacted. One does not wish to find himself in Red Hook after dark, because… y’know, vampires. Just because you think they’re a myth doesn’t mean that your bloodless corpse won’t be found floating in the Gowanus early the next morning, nor that you won’t awaken as a starving lich on some coroners table in downtown Brooklyn.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
Wonders can be observed here, in Red Hook, as it’s not all Lovecraftian horror around these parts. Well… allow me to rephrase that, as the area surrounding the Gowanus Expressway is fairly antithetical to human existence – but that’s why it makes such a great home for that colony of south Brooklyn vampires which have plagued the area for better than a century. It is said that the vampires arrived with a grain shipment from Germany in the early 1900’s, quickly established themselves in the neighborhood, and never left. Don’t be prejudiced against them, though, Vampires have to pay their tax just like everyone else. Dead or alive, no one beats the IRS.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
Legend has it that the Quadrozzi company has finally evicted the squatting Nosferatu from their nearby grain terminal building, where these vampires had been firmly ensconced for better than half a century. Speculation about whether or not these displaced nocturnes have made a new home in the high flying rafters of the Gowanus Expressway (neighborhood legend suggests that they hang upside down like bats in the perennial shadows of the roadway) remains just that, although area residents offer the complaint that the local cops won’t investigate anything that even remotely sounds like an exsanguination nor answer complaints about missing dogs.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
The living population of Red Hook actually miss the presence of NYC’s Five Families around these parts. Common knowledge states that the reason why the Vatican has so long tolerated the presence of the Italian Mafia is because of their track record when it comes to controlling and eliminating Vampires, which are the natural enemies of clerical and monkish populations. There are no greater Vampire killers than these racketeers, whose ranks have become sadly diminished around their former stronghold at the Gowanus.
Thanks Giuliani, thanks a whole lot.
“follow” me on Twitter- @newtownpentacle
rhythmical promises
Thinking it through, in today’s post.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
The way that the human infestation hereabouts behaves and operates can be described, and made somewhat predictable, via the usage of branch logic. When presented with a decision, you can choose option A or option B – a binary decision. Both have logical next steps. These steps flow out of the original decision, form a branching tree of binary choices – a logical progression of decisions. “If” and “then” and “next” and so on are encountered.
A random factor – X – begins to creep into this process around five or six branches down from the original decision. As an example – I decide to punch a guy in the nose, or not. If I hit him, does he a) hit me back, or b) runs away. A, or B form logical progressions that branch out from their individual decision points. Let’s say that the guy hits me back, do I a) punch him again or b) run away crying? If I choose “B,” how far do I run and where do I go? What happens next? You can postulate a few likely, or highly probable steps, but “X” always rears its ugly head eventually.
“X” is also known as “unintended consequences,” which is the one predictable constant of every human decision.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
As I’ve mentioned in the past, I’m absolutely fascinated by the Carriage Horse story going on here in the City, wherein our current Mayor has vowed to eliminate the industry from area streets. Animal welfare activists have long opposed the continuing presence of horse drawn carriages on New York streets, citing that the animals are found commingling with automotive and truck traffic. Often, I have pointed out that human children mingle with the self same traffic which is meant to pose this existential threat, but no one seems to care about that. The Carriage industry has accused the Mayor of crass politicking on behalf of a campaign donor, and offers that theirs is a generational craft with long traditions and that their animals are in superb condition. Additionally, they attest that their animals are working creatures who essentially provide for their own needs by pulling these carriages. The NY Daily News is all over this story, and I’d suggest swinging over to their site to check their take out. I’ve no skin in this game, but for some reason I remain enthusiastically attentive to it.
Anyway, that’s the decision which faces the Big Little Mayor – eliminate the Carriage Horse industry or keep it around. A binary decision, ultimately, which will become diluted and colored Legislative Gray somewhere down the tree of “If’s” and “And’s.” As always, one such as myself has nothing but free time to worry about things that really don’t concern me, and a certain driving thought manifested while I was working down the logical tree.
It was a simple question that emerged behind my fevered brow.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
What about the Police Horses?
It occurs that I have never, not once, heard anyone complain or protest about the use of horses on NYC streets by NYPD. These are critically well trained animals, of course, conditioned to be non reactive to everything from parades and protesting crowds to gunfire and active duty situations. Arguably, these animals are subjected to greater stressors than their livery brethren working the relatively quiet streets around Central Park. Additionally, these critters are under the direct supervision of the Police departmental structure and by extension City Hall, which brings us back to the Mayor. The logical extension of banning the carriage horses from NYC streets, on the grounds of animal cruelty, would demand that all horses would need to be spared these conditions, no?
This is where the “X” factor mentioned above comes into play, when you’re thinking through the logic of eliminating an entire industry or just punching a guy in the nose it is wise to think about how your choice might play out.
“follow” me on Twitter- @newtownpentacle
trickling from
Those Astoria Tumbleweeds… they’re back.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
Friday the 3rd of January saw a humble narrator out early, as one had professional obligations to fulfill. While waiting for my breakfast sandwich to be assembled at a greasy spoon on Broadway, here in almond eyed Astoria, observation of a carefully placed and quite discarded Christmas tree occurred. It would have made the news if this coniferous corpse was placed in a bike lane, but instead…
– photo by Mitch Waxman
The ever reliable DSNY has posted an instructive page here, which describes the proper procedure for disposing of holiday cheer. The municipal organization has a large mulching operation set up to aid in the disposal of the seasonal cultivar, and no where in its list of specificities governing the process does it say “throw it into the middle of the street.” Ahh, Astoria.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
The purchase of breakfast complete, one did not have time to watch the thing roll about in the street. Rather a somewhat epic journey was undertaken, wherein the longest and most expensive possible route (using mass transit) to Brooklyn was undertaken. Why do you need to leave the Long Island, traveling through Manhattan, to arrive at a spot on the Long Island less than 7 miles from your starting point? It’s just silly.
“follow” me on Twitter- @newtownpentacle
cold and cramping
Lurid shimmerings of pale light, that’s what I’m about.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
The hours one spends marching about Queens are severely impinged upon by weather during the winter months, a fact injurious to both health and morale. A humble narrator attempts to fill the empty hours productively, but there is little solace for one such as myself in hours spent in the office. Perhaps relocating to a warmer climate is in order? That would mean that New York City had finally beaten me, and that a life long grudge match had been lost.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
The various medications which my staff of doctors prescribe to manage those ailments which bedevil and weaken my material form have a certain downside –inducing a particular fragility to my homeostasis when the temperature dips down. Simply said, cold weather such as that which the City is experiencing is actually painful. Vital ichors run away from the extremities, and one begins to experience the sense of being in a long dark tunnel which terminates in a distant but brightly lit aperture. I call that aperture “April.”
– photo by Mitch Waxman
The hard reality of this, I’m only a quadragenanarian after all, has made me truly love to see the oil companies delivering the fuel that stokes all the furnaces and boilers. I propose a new secular holiday, one which celebrates the constancy and efforts of the oil truck man, without whom we’d all surely freeze to death. Brr.
“follow” me on Twitter- @newtownpentacle
Captain Doswell
Captain John Doswell has passed away.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
Executive Director of the Working Harbor Committee, Captain John Doswell’s mission was to educate the public about the Harbor of New York and New Jersey. He was a part owner of the John J. Harvey fireboat, a respected speaker on all things maritime, a devoted husband and father, and my friend.
He died as he lived, surrounded by the family he so adored.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
After serving in the United States Navy in Viet Nam, Captain Doswell produced trade shows and industrial videos, eventually finding himself in the software business. In the mid 1990’s Captain Doswell shifted his attentions to the waterfront.
Pictured above is how I’ll always remember him, narrating to a sold out boat, explaining every little nuance of what they were seeing at Port Newark, or circumnavigating Staten Island, or while exploring Erie Basin.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
He worked with the Friends of Hudson River Park and the Working Harbor Committee – and a host of elected officials – to bring New Yorkers into closer contact with the water. Captain Doswell coordinated and organized the maritime operations of OpSail 2012, the City of Water Day festivals on Governors Island, the Liberty Challenge International Outrigger Canoe Races, and literally dozens of Working Harbor trips and the annual Great North River Tugboat Race.
He would also regularly send a NY Water Taxi, with some lunatic blogger on the mike, to Newtown Creek.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
John Doswell built communities wherever he went. Once you found yourself in his orbit, there was always something amazing going on around him. He was generous with his time, and renowned for an even temperament. It was an honor to know him, and the privilege of having spent as much time as I did with him over the last few years is an incalculable blessing.
The world is a poorer place without him.
– photo by Mitch Waxman
Captain John Doswell is survived by his beloved, Jean Preece Doswell, and their daughter Jhoneen. The event of the year for the NY Harbor Community in 2014 was their wedding on July 25 of last year. The NY Times ran a full profile of the event here, which was held on the John J Harvey Fireboat and Lilac – historic vessels which Captain Doswell helped to preserve.
I’m going to miss him.
“follow” me on Twitter- @newtownpentacle
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